Barbara Wilson: The Invisible Bond: How to Break Free From Your Sexual Past: Blog

What's God's Love Language?

2011-09-09T14:15:00.000-07:00

Gary Chapman has changed all our lives with his book on love languages. He says there are five love languages and we all have at least two that make us feel love. They are physical touch, words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time and gifts. Recently our young married small group examined our own love languages and how we utilized them in our marriages.
Often, Chapman says, we give love in how we like to receive love. If gifts is our love language, than we usually like to give gifts. However, if the person we're trying to love on doesn't interpret gifts as being loved, but would rather have quality time, than even though we've done our best to show them love, they may not be able to receive our love.
It made me think about God. Does God have a love language? Is there something that makes God feel loved? It came out of a conversation I was having with God one day. I wanted Him to know that I really, really loved Him. But I know that sometimes words are easy to say. We can say, I love you all day long, but unless we're doing things that show our love, the words can be meaningless. At least that's what I Corinthians 13 says. Love here is depicted in actions..."love is kind, love is patient, love does not envy, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs..." I don't hear any "I love you's" in this passage, at least not with words.
As I asked God this day, "How can I show you I love you?", Gary Chapman's love languages came to mind, and immediately I knew what God's love language was. Do you know what it is? Is it attending church? Serving in lots of ministries? Is it spending time in prayer and bible reading? What about abstaining from all the bad sins...like alcohol, movies and playing cards? (anyone raised Baptist:)? Or does something else come to mind for you?

To answer the question, let's look at what Jesus said about what makes Him feel loved. In John 14:15 Jesus said, "If you love me, you will obey what I command."

Obedience? That's God's love language? Yes, obedience. Although attending church, bible study, and eliminating sin from our lives is all part of a healthy Christian walk, and may even be something God is asking you to do...Jesus didn't quote any of these as a sign that we love Him. What He said is, "I feel loved when you obey what I say."

You see we can sit in church every week, hearing God's message to us, and then just ignore it, and not obey it. We can read our bibles every day and pray, and hear God's message to us loud and clear, and still blow it off. And while these things are wonderful and we should do them, none of them communicate love to God. His love language is obedience.

So what does it mean to obey? Sometimes that can feel overwhelming. I talked with someone who felt if she didn't obey everything God said in the bible, she was sinning. I replied, "You can only obey what you know, what God has asked you to obey." In other words, obey what God is asking you today...don't worry about all the things you don't know you're not doing...just start with the one thing He's asking you today.

God is so kind and gentle and gracious towards us. I've discovered that He doesn't bombard me with dozens of requests at once of things to obey...it's usually one thing at a time. Obeying God may seem difficult, but all it takes is staying close to Him so you recognize His voice when He asks you to do something, and then saying "Yes, God I'll do that." You may not want to do it, or even know how to do it, but that's okay. Because God will give you the desire to obey, and even the step by step process in how to do it. Your starting point is just saying, "Yes."

John 3:16 says that God showed His love towards us by sending us His Son as a Redeemer and Savior. Thankfully God doesn't ask the same level of sacrifice from us...only that we'll obey what He asks us to do. Do you want to show God you love Him? How can you make God feel loved today?

"If you love me," He says, "You'll obey what I command."

It's that simple.

10 Yr. Old Model's Grown Up Look--cute or sexy?

2011-08-04T12:20:00.000-07:00

http://abcnews.go.com/m/story?id=14221160

Does she look 10 to you? I saw little girls like this in Cambodia. They would come all dressed up, with makeup and jewelry to the kid's club. They were petite, innocent, yet looked older than their years. The parents were preparing to sell them for sex, and this was how they'd dress them up to entice men to want to buy them.

Child pornography has fueled the market for little girls to be dressed as sex objects--and the sexualization of our girls. Just look at the clothing line marketed to little girls today. With a 3 yr. old granddaughter, I've seen what's out there, and its alarming. And yet, in the name of fashion and art, it all appears innocent and acceptable? Or not.

All I know is that pornography is progressive. It leads to increasingly more perverse and hardcore porn, including the most evil--child porn. Adults having sex with children, children having sex together. And studies show that people who view pornography are more likely to act out sexually, use prostitutes, buy children for sex, traffic children for sex, and abuse children. You can rationalize it all you want, but the truth is child porn is fueling child sexual abuse, and the sexualization of our children. And what we see here is a result of that.

In my opinion, this ten year old isn't a model, she's a victim.

Barbara

Is Casual Sex Worth It?

2011-07-29T13:07:00.000-07:00

I write about sex. More specifically how causal sex is hurting our generation. How do I know? Because it hurt me. But even more, now that I speak and write and lead people through sexual healing, I've discovered that it hasn't just hurt me...but all of us. I help people find healing from their past sexual wounds, whether from abuse, trauma or their own choices, as in casual sex.

I found the discussion in this CNN article, "Is Sex Worth It?" very interesting. And I'd love to hear what you think? Has casual sex hurt you? If you had casual sex, do you regret it? Was it worth it? What would you advise a young person now?

You can click on the link Is Casual Sex Worth It? to read the article.

Blessings, Barb

TO CAMBODIA WITH LOVE

2011-07-28T13:35:00.000-07:00

This is the email we received from Sophy, assistant to the Director of AIM after we left for the airport. This is a sample of the amazing, humble Christians working hard in Cambodia for God, but also how our service blessed them.

Dear Bayside Team;

It has been a wonderful blessing to be able to serve God with you. For the past two weeks, I have seen your eagerness to serve, to love and to be with us. It is so true that each of you was investing something else apart from material, time and your context back home. Each of you was a part of our Cambodian Heaven Community. By now, each of us may have already realized that you have stolen our heart, and your departure has left us a vision and a hope to make that heaven realm become even more realistic and sustainable.

Culturally, we have been raised with intimidations to help others, to use our ability for the benefit of others, to fix what have been broken and to heal the wounds and sicknesses we have put on ourselves. While individualism and the pursuit for merely worldly comfort is binding us, your team presence has helped us to see how we can untie it. The joy of being together as a community is what we lack or do not have and your presence let us tasted that, and it was good!

Some significant things I have heard, which we are proud of and appreciate include:

Kid’s Club ministry, “the team has been very patient in working with the children; they loved each kids equally; we had a great team work with them”

Computer Ministry, “the computer lessons were very clear and we were given full attention”

The Lord’s Gym, “each man and boy who came to the Lord’s gym felt loved and the joy of learning and the excitement in the competitions have been overwhelming”

The music ministry, “we were given full attention; the trainer was very patient with us; and, we have learned a lot”

The community, “the smiles and a sense that we actually have people that want to care for us”

On behalf of AIM, I would like to say, “Or Kun (thank you)” to each of you for providing a space for us to serve together with you and to show my people how much Jesus loves and wants for Svay Park community. I believe we have also stolen your heart too, and hopefully we will see you all again. We will remember you!

Abundant Blessings,

Servant Sophy & Rahab’s House

Cambodia Day Nine and Ten!

2011-07-06T05:30:00.000-07:00

We've had a couple of very busy days here in Phnom Penh which is why I haven't had a chance to post an update. I've been enjoying the opportunity to teach trauma to the teachers in Svay Pak and the staff at the Hard Places Boy's home. Its been amazing to see God touch the hearts of the staff. As I teach them about trauma so they can help their students, God is using what I'm teaching to help them heal from their own trauma.

As a team we're starting to feel better from all our stomach issues as we adjust to the food here. We can't believe we just have two more days here in Cambodia. Monday we had dinner with Moses and Samantha, the original founders of AIM. Moses runs the church planting arm of AIM, and to date has planted over 1000 churches. Yes, you read correctly, 1000! He is the Billy Graham of Cambodia, and a modern Moses, leading his people to the Lord and the promised land. Before the Pol Pot regime in the 70s, Moses was high up in the military and government. He barely escaped with his life as the military and government people were first on Pol Pot's hit list. He came to America and was educated and then returned to Cambodia just 8 years ago and in that time has planted these 1000 churches.

Because of his contacts in government, Moses invited the Secretary of State, the Minister of Parliament, and the LT. Governor Adviser to the Ministry of the Interior to dinner with us. The Secretary of State expressed his appreciation to us for our love of the Cambodia children and our continued efforts to assist in helping rescue girls from the sex slave trade.

Thankyou for your prayers. This week we've had so much opportunity to bless the families at the Brick Factories with mosquito nets, shoes, school uniforms and school supplies, as well as toothbrushes and toothpaste. Pray that these families will begin to trust Pastor Chantha and want to come to church to hear more about Jesus.

love and blessings,
Barb

Cambodia Day Eight

2011-07-03T04:24:00.000-07:00

Today is Sunday July 3rd. We were up early and heading out to Svay Pak for church by 7am. This week three of us shared a short message with the people, and AJ had his music students play a song while we sang with them. It was a great service. All three of us talked about how we were a big family. And regardless of our address, or where in the world we lived, if we knew Jesus we were all part of the same family.

After church, we ordered in pizza, hamburgers and cokes for approximately 75 of us. The Cambodian staff, our team, and a team from Michigan here working at the Hard Places boy's home. The Cambodian's loved the pizza and hamburgers, although for us, it didn't taste quite like home. Our little lunch turned into a huge party with singing, games and dancing. It was an amazing celebration of the fun, unity and spirit we have in Christ together.

Its been a busy week followed by two full days of weekend. We're up early again and back to Svay Pak to work tomorrow. We're tired, and many are not feeling 100%. Please pray for renewed energy and passion this week, our last 5 days in Cambodia.

The triad arrived last night and it was great to see them finally here. For those who don't know, the triad is two girls and a guy from Bayside who are moving to Cambodia to work with Agape for a year. One girl, Jayme is Roma's (my co-leader) daughter. The two girls, Jayme and Kaitlin are here for the second time, but this is Isaac's first time to Cambodia. They all have an adjustment to make, so please keep them in your prayers. We'll have them with us this week in Svay Pak.

Well, its been a long day and I'm ready to get some rest. God's blessings to you, and thank you for your continued prayers.

Barb

Cambodia Day Seven

2011-07-02T07:08:00.000-07:00

Its Saturday night here and we're just getting home from a busy day. Today we went to the Agape Restoration Center and put on a Fourth of July party for the 60 girls who've been rescued from sex-trafficking. 60 girls who've experienced the horror and evil of sex-trafficking, but are in the process of being transformed by the love and healing of Jesus. It never ceases to amaze me that these bright, smiley, joyful girls have been through so much. Its a testimony of what love can do, especially the love of Jesus.

It was a day of music, dancing, pizza, games, crafts, cake and gifts. The girls sang, danced, laughed...but most importantly, felt treasured, loved and beautiful as we lavished on them.

Then we were lavished on at Bloom Cafe...a professional bakery where the girls from Agape learn the skills and creativity of professional cake decorating. The girls have made cakes for the highest officials in the government, including the King and the Prime Minister's daughter.

Our next visit of the day took us to Hard Places Boy's Home where we toured this new facility that will be a center of hope, healing and freedom for sexually exploited boys. We learned today that the little boys who scour the streets looking for customers to sell their basket of books to, have to meet a quota every day for their parents or pimps. If they don't make the quota, they are required to sell themselves for sex through the night. That heartbreaking truth compelled me to over-pay for a bracelet from one of these lads--a small, young one, in hopes that for this one, his quota would be met, at least for tonight.

Tomorrow is Sunday, and we will leave for the 3 hour church service at the early hour of 7pm to arrive by the 7:30 start time. We'll be sharing in the service and singing for them. Afterwards we're putting on another lunch party for the staff at Rahab's House. Along with our team and the team from Hard Places, and Rahab's staff, we will be sharing lunch with 75 of our Cambodian and American brothers and sisters. Pizza, hamburgers and coke is on the menu...which the Cambodian's are very excited about. One of the girls at Rahab's house told me that she'd only had pizza one time in her life, and she's 28 years old.

Thankyou for your prayers. We have several sick with stomach issues due to the different food here. Please pray for strength and health as we prepare to start another busy week at Rahab's house.

Thank you...God's blessings on all of you at home!

barb

Cambodia Day Six

2011-07-01T03:29:00.000-07:00

It's rainy season here in Cambodia right now. We've had some tropical rain and thunderstorms here the last few days. Its really refreshing and I love letting the rain cool me off. Today I had a moto ride home in the rain. Pretty amazing! And scary!

I have a new job starting today in the afternoons. I'll be teaching trauma education to another mission group called Hard Places. I met the Director of this group two years ago on my first trip to Cambodia. She is the counselor who helped start the kids club program in Svay Pak. She then went on to become the head counselor at Agape's Restoration Center. But her dream has been to open a boys home to reach the sexually-exploited boys in Cambodia. Well her dream came true this past month with the opening of a new boy's home. She asked me to come and teach her staff trauma education, and help them learn some healing techniques for the boys. As well, educate them on how to help the boys with their on-going trauma. So every afternoon I'll be heading back into Phnom Penh from Svay Pak to spend two hours training her staff, and equipping them to help these children heal from their trauma.

My class had 16 people in it. It included four Khmer staff, plus two American staff as well as several American college students on a work mission trip. In addition we had a woman who works with some of the girls from the Agape Restoration Center. Also next week, I'll be teaching this trauma curriculum to the teachers in Svay Pak in the mornings. I'm really excited about this opportunity and ask you to pray for me that God will anoint my words, and give me wisdom and discernment as I teach them.

Its Friday night here and our team is feeling tired and drained. Please pray for renewed strength and rest this weekend. We have a busy weekend putting on a fourth of July party for the girls at the restoration center...these are the girls who've been rescued and live at the home for exploited girls.

Happy Birthday America! We celebrate with you on the other side of the world!
Love and blessings,
Barb

Cambodia Day Five

2011-06-30T07:08:00.000-07:00

God began performing miracles for our team long before we left the United States...especially in the area of finances. This team of 12 rocked this year in the fund-raising department. But we give all the credit to God. He is the one who compelled others to support this mission trip. It's His money we give, which is why we carry out our stewardship responsibilities with careful consideration and prayer. But the first miracle is that this year's team of 12 raised far more than last year's team of 14. How to go Team Cambodia 2011. And people are continuing to give! Thankyou so much!

At the end of our two weeks last year after all our expenses were paid, and we'd spent thousands of dollars on medicine, rice, shoes, supplies, and giving the ARC girls a fourth of July party, we still had $6200 left over to leave with Agape International Mission for their ongoing expenses.

This year our team of 12 raised so much money that we were able to cut a check for $8000 to give to AIM before we even left the country. The rest of our money was budgeted to include expenses, as well as buying medicine, mosquito nets, school supplies and uniforms, and supply the ARC girls with another rocking fourth of July party.

But then our first day in Svay Pak, the Cambodian team presented us with several unexpected needs and we wondered how we'd find this extra money to be able to say yes to all these requests.

Well God has been rearranging our budget day after day, helping us find extra money in places we'd never expected--allowing us to supply more needs than we could have imagined. First, the same food for the fourth of July party this year is half of what it cost last year, freeing up several hundred dollars. Then the school supplies we bought today for the brick factory children cost us a fifth of what we budgeted, freeing up $400 dollars to buy new flip-flops for all the brick factory children.

Every day it's exciting to see what God has in store for us, and how He will provide. I love the child-like trust the people have here in God. They don't worry about money, or where their next meal will come from...because they know that all they have comes directly from the hand of God. And He has yet to disappoint them.

Their faith reminds me of David's prayer in Psalm 131: "My heart is not proud, O Lord, my eyes are not haughty; I do not concern myself with great matters or things too wonderful for me. But I have stilled and quieted my soul; like a weaned child with its mother, like a weaned child is my soul within me. O Israel, put your hope in the Lord both now and forevermore."

Childlike faith does not concern itself with things beyond it's control, or matters it doesn't understand. Instead in the middle of uncertainty, or when circumstances are cause for concern, those with child-like faith choose to still and quiet their souls like a child totally dependent on their mother. Like the quiet confidence a child has knowing they'll be protected and provided for always.

Our brothers and sisters in Cambodia may not have much by America's definition, but they have something many of us have yet to possess..the humble, still, confident child-like faith that releases the power of Almighty God into their moment by moment lives. And that my friends, is pure faith...the kind of faith that pleases God.

Cambodia Day Four

2011-06-29T05:30:00.000-07:00

Today was a lot of fun in Svay Pak as I became more accustomed to the medical lingo. My team is calling me Dr. B now which I'm loving:)! Our team is already working together so well. It's wonderful, but not surprising because we've been asking God for that very thing.

During our lunch break everyday we are visiting 9 local brick factories where entire families live and work. Most are indebted to the brick factory owner and barely make enough to eat, let alone pay back their debt. While there today Pastor Chantha shared the story of one of the families. The husband died and left his wife and three children. She didn't have any money to bury him, so the brick factory owner took his body and threw it off the property onto the road. Devastated, the wife came to Pastor Chantha and he provided funds to purchase a coffin so they could bury him with honor. But the family was still in debt. Their debt meant a life sentence at the brick factory because they owed the owner $507. A debt they would never be able to pay.

Pastor Chantha shared the family's plight with friends in Canada and someone donated money to pay the debt. Can you imagine the family's delight and surprise when Pastor Chantha came with the $507 and set them free? I can, because I've seen how they live. I've witnessed the filth, poverty, pain and desperation they're surrounded with every day. $507 is not very much money for many of us in America, and yet for this family, it meant life, it meant freedom. It meant breaking a cycle of debt, dishonor and poverty. It meant returning to their home province to see family they hadn't seen in twenty years due to their debt.

Why would someone pay a debt they didn't owe and didn't deserve for someone they didn't know? Because Jesus paid our debt...a debt He didn't deserve, for us...to set us free. And when you know Jesus, and discover the delight of having your debt cancelled, you can't help but do the same for others.

Why do we desire to see others set free?
Because Jesus' love compels us...it's the only answer that makes sense.

Cambodia Day Three!

2011-06-28T08:05:00.000-07:00

Today was a better day in Svay Pak for all the team. It takes that first day for everyone to get used to the new faces and for us to adjust to how things are done here. I had the opportunity to work in the medical clinic diagnosing and treating patients. I know, that's scary! But we had a doctor and nurse to consult with plus a list of things to ask and common ailments.
Each of us had a translator. I caught on fairly fast to the protocol and really began to enjoy myself.
There are several common problems here all associated with poor eating, dehydration, vitamin deficiency and sexually transmitted diseases. The conditions I saw that would never be allowed to exist in America were heart-breaking. There is no health care here. Everything costs money and so people suffer for years with common, curable ailments.
But they come by the dozens and they come for miles to Rahab's clinic. Many travel past other free clinics just to come here. Why? "Because at Rahab's house they feel better," they say. They feel love and hope and are treated with genuine care and dignity.
They all hear about Jesus, the One, True Healer. Many are prayed over, everyone prayed for. But all leave touched by the hands of Jesus through those who serve at Rahab's house.
I read of a man who prayed every day that he would see Jesus. One day a knock on his door revealed a dirty, ragged, sick, and scraggly old man. He wreaked of alcohol, human odor and days of filth. He was homeless, broken and penniless. As he stood there looking at this man he heard His Savior say, "You wanted to see Me. Now you have."

Today I had a glimpse of Jesus in these precious people. I got a glimpse of the burden He bears for them, and the love He feels. Even more amazing is that Jesus would be willing to let me see Him in them today, and share His burden for them with me.

Cambodia Day Two

2011-06-27T06:08:00.000-07:00

Before I talk about Cambodia I need to wish my husband happy anniversary! Today is our 30th wedding anniversary! Eric, I thank God for you! You have blessed my life and given me more than I could ever have imagined. I love you so much.

We had an incredible first day. Everyone jumped into their assignments with great enthusiasm. As always the first day opens our eyes to the needs around us, and helps us readjust our American thinking of what will or will not work. We do the best we can to prepare, but then once we're here, we have to let go of all our expectations, and allow God to work. That means being flexible, patient and gracious regardless of what happens. Its such a great lesson for us to learn.

There are so many needs, and now we are trusting God to stretch our dollars to be able to provide for the needs that are being placed before us. None of it is a surprise to God and so like last year, we trust Him to provide for all He has planned for us to do on this trip.

The hardest part of the day was going to the brick factory. The people working and living there are the poorest of this society. Working at slave labor prices, they are seldom able to rise above this level of poverty. We are able to provide them with some basic needs as rice, mosquito nets, soap, wound care, tooth paste and tooth brushes, and some food for the children. But even more than basic care we give them love, hope, laughter and dignity.

Thanks for your prayers...
Barb

Day One in Cambodia

2011-06-26T07:50:00.000-07:00

First full day in Cambodia! It was a great time of reconnecting with old friends here from Agape. We went to church in Svay Pak and then toured the killing fields and Toul Slang prison. We got a historical picture of the horrific genocide that the Pol Pot executed back in the 70s massacuring a third of the Cambodia people. It is really overwhelming the capacity for evil we humans are. Tomorrow we get to work first thing in the morning. We're down for breakfast and devotions by 6:45. Then in the vans to Kilometer 11 or the community of Svay Pak. I will ltell you all about our first day tomorrow.

Please pray for our safety. I almost got hit tonight by a moto. Pedestrians do not have the right of way here! Blessings and thankyou for your prayers!

Barb and team Cambodia 2011

Cambodia 2011--Here we go again...

2011-06-21T13:59:00.000-07:00

For the third summer in a row, I'm heading to Cambodia to work with Agape International Mission,(AIM) a group that helps rescue, heal and restore girls sold into the sex slave trade. Cambodia is a well known global hub for sex-trafficking. And Svay Pak, the community where Agape ministers, is well known as a place for pedophiles to come and have sex with very little girls. Although having sex with a child under the age of 16 is illegal in Cambodia, law enforcement and the government have closed their eyes to this evil. But God and AIM are changing that. AIM has exposed the evils of sex-trafficking of little boys and girls in Cambodia through their investigative work, as well as the success in being able to rescue so many girls out of harm's way. At their restoration home in Phnom Penh they've brought love, joy, hope and healing to scores of young girls who otherwise would have no hope. As well, Svay Pak, once a place of oppression, evil, darkness and poverty, now has a beacon of light and hope in their community at Rahab's House, a former brothel, turned community center, church, school, and medical center--all free services ministering to the entire community of Svay Pak.
This year I'm taking a team of 12 men and women from Bayside Church and we will spend two weeks working in Svay Pak at Rahab's house, diving into all the outreach ministries AIM is involved in every day. We'll be working with about 300 children from the community who are currently being sold for sex by their parents.
Please pray for us as we bring the love and hope of Jesus into this community and work alongside the Cambodian team of brothers and sisters who tirelessly serve God and this community every day. We ask you to pray for our safety, unity as a team, opportunities to share God's love through action and word to all God brings our way, and the finances to support all the needs God brings to our attention. God has blessed our team financially because of many of your faithful gifts, and because of that, we'll be able to pour much needed funds into the community as God leads. Some of the things we'll be able to do is...buy rice and mosquito nets for local brick factory families, medicine for the clinic, and food and school supplies for the children who come to kid's club.

I'll be blogging at this site during my stay...we leave Thursday June 23rd. Look for my blogs starting June 25th once we arrive in country.
thankyou for your support and prayers,
Blessings, barb

Married to One, but in Love with Another

2011-05-26T09:39:00.000-07:00

I recently wrote an article for Family Life Canada and received this question: How can you be in love with one person, but marry another?
This was my reply:

When we have sex we bond with them, physically, emotionally, spiritually and mentally, as well as chemically. We release chemicals and hormones that creates a bond or attachment with that person. God says He makes 'two into one flesh' through sexual intimacy. Both men and women release a hormone called oxytocin which is the bonding hormone, causing men and women to be glued together. Oxytocin is what creates that love feeling.

And in marriage as you have sex over and over...you bond more and more and your love deepens and matures. But when we have sex outside marriage and then break up, we start to damage our bonding hormone...we release less and less with each subsequent partner. Eventually if we've had enough adverse romantic experiences involving sex (where we love and then break up) we can inhibit our ability to bond fully the way God intended in marriage.

Hypothetically if someone had sex with a first love, she bonded with him. Then when they broke up, she was wounded...as she moved to her next relationship, she fell in love again, but wouldn't have bonded as much in the next relationship. Depending on how many sexual partners she bonded with before marriage would depend on just how well she bonded with her husband.

Just because we get married doesn't mean the past is all wiped away. We bring all those past partners into marriage with us, and in fact stay bonded to them without really knowing it. Then when we begin to experience difficulties in our marriage, and our love wanes, our attachment to past partners can cause us to still feel love for them. Also oxytocin increases the recall of the positive events of past relationships and decreases the recall of the negative. So when her marriage began to have cracks, she began to fantasize about the good in the last relationship...and began to wonder if life would have been better with him.

But unfortunately it's fantasy and not reality. All marriages experience struggles and sometimes we have days when we don't 'feel' love for each other. But when we've bonded well, the difficult times help us grow closer together and our love deepens. But if we are still attached to past lovers, we will stay in the past, and resist the work needed to grow our marriages. But when we let God heal us and break us from past relationships, we can fully love and bond with our spouses. Which is why I encourage young people to go through healing for all past sexual partners and experiences so that they don't bring anyone else into their marriages and are able to fully bond with their spouse.

Science is showing that God can heal the brain, and restore our ability to release oxytocin even if its been depleted because of past wounding. God has done this in my own life and marriage, and in countless others as I've led men and women through sexual healing the past 7 years.

So I guess what I'm saying is that this scenario doesn't have to be...with healing, we can be fully bonded and love our spouse regardless of past relationships. I'm praying that God gives you hope that what you long for and desire is really what He desires for all of us in marriage, and that when we trust Him, its also possible.

Cambodia 2011

2011-05-17T14:23:00.001-07:00

STOP THE SALE OF CHILDREN FOR SEX

Having my eyes opened to the global tragedy of sex-trafficking on my first trip to Cambodia in 2009, has changed me forever. Since then God has led me to serve in many ways to help rescue and restore the victims of sex-trafficking. Here I am speaking at the United Nations, Conference on the Status of Women in Feb 2011 on how to help women heal from the trauma of sex-trafficking. This past year I’ve also begun to help in a local ministry called Courage House that is providing a loving, healing home for victims of sex-trafficking in Sacramento.
But the children of Cambodia still have my heart.

This year I’m leading the team again from Bayside church as we go to serve Agape International Mission (aim4asia.org) in their on-going, successful mission to rescue girls from the streets of Svay Pak who are sold by their parents for sex. In addition to the home where the rescued girls find love and restoration, as well as educational and vocational training, AIM serves the community of Svay Pak by offering a free medical clinic, kid’s club, school, gym, computer classes and church. Because of AIM, God is changing the hearts of the people in this community and girls are being rescued and restored.

Your generous support will allow us to pour needed funds into all these ministries. Last year we were able to supply some of the poorest families at local brick factories with rice, shoes, and medicine. Rahab’s house in Svay Pak received funds for medicine, kid’s club, the gym and computer classes. We also put on a celebration 4th of July party for the girls at the restoration home. After all this, there was still enough to leave AIM with $6,200 for ongoing operational costs.

I’m asking you to support me with prayer and finances once again as God takes me to Cambodia to serve Him in the work of rescuing, caring for and restoring these victims of sex trafficking. In addition, we’ll provide love and care to those who’ve yet to be rescued in Svay Pak.

Thankyou for partnering with us in this vital mission work. If you’re receiving this as a hardcopy, you can mail in the enclosed card. Please do not put my name anywhere on the check. To do so will mean you won’t get the tax deduction.

You can also give online with Bayside’s Global new online giving at http://bit.ly/ha1PYW. You’ll find my name under the Cambodia heading for trips. If you’re receiving this as an email, print off the attached card and mail in, or use the online link. This is time-sensitive, as I'm still in need of $600 in the next two weeks in order to meet my financial needs.

Thank you and may God Bless you for blessing us…

Barbara

Making a Difference in Cambodia

2010-08-24T20:11:00.000-07:00

Although we've been home from Cambodia for a few weeks, Cambodia has never left us! Here is an overview of Bayside's 2010 Cambodia Mission trip:

Agape International Mission, (AIM) headquartered in Phnom Penh Cambodia has two arms of ministry: 1) planting churches—led by Moses, a Cambodia Pastor who has birthed and oversees 800 churches, and 2) the rescue and restoration of young girls sold into sex slavery.
About six years ago, AIM led by Don and Bridget Brewster, a northern Californian couple, opened Agape Restoration Center (ARC), a home where about 60 girls who’ve been sold for sex now find safety, healing and Jesus. Then three years ago AIM began ministry in Svay Pak, a community 11km outside Phnom Penh. Svay Pak is known around the world as one of the hubs for the sex slavery of young children, starting as young as 5—who are sold by their parents for sex right out of their homes. Svay Pak is a violent, poor, oppressive place where children who are abused, abandoned and neglected live in constant fear.
But in the three years since AIM moved in, the hope, joy and love of Christ has begun to transform Svay Pak from the inside out.
AIM took a 5 story building destined to be one of the many brothels in town and turned it into a haven of safety and love, called Rahab’s House. A place once planned for harm has now become home to a free school for over 100 children, a church (that’s grown to 300-400 people), a free medical clinic that sees hundreds of people a week, an after-school kid’s club reaching 200 children a day, a community center offering computer classes for all ages, and a Lord’s gym that reaches the men of the community—some of whom are pimps, sexual perpetrators, gangsters and drug addicts.
For 2 weeks our Bayside team of 14 had the privilege of coming alongside AIM in Svay Pak in their various ministries: we helped in the gym; the medical clinic; the kid’s club; we taught computer classes to local teenagers; and conducted trauma education training for the 28 young people called Disciples who’ve recently come to know Jesus and now volunteer 40 hours a week at Rahab’s House. In addition we brought needed supplies as well as first aid and personal hygiene training to over 500 adults and children who work as slave laborers at 5 local brick factories, making barely enough to buy food to feed themselves.
When I went on my first mission trip, I wondered what kind of impact could we make in just two weeks? A great deal, I discovered.
• In addition to God impacting every one of our lives, were able to encourage and support the people of AIM who work tirelessly everyday—we were able to bring joy, love and laughter to the children who are trafficked every night, as well as love on their pimps, and comfort the sick and oppressed.
• We provided toothpaste, toothbrushes, shampoo, soap, first aid kids, masks, sandals, and rice for over 500 people at the brick factories
• We helped supply the clinic with over $2000 in medical supplies and medicines
• We blessed the girls at ARC with a freedom party celebrating their freedom from slavery and their new freedom in Christ—on the 4th of July
• And like the woman’s jar of oil that never ran dry in the bible---after supplying the needs of the people for the two weeks and all our expenses, we were still able to leave AIM $6200 for their on-going expenses.
But the impact goes beyond the financial and physical. I discovered after talking with those 28 Disciples that many of them came to know Jesus because they were so moved by the fact that foreigners would come all the way to Cambodia to help them, and if this Jesus loved them so much that He would compel people to do that then they wanted to know Him.
One young woman told me with tears streaming down her face that before she came to Rahab’s house, before she came to know Jesus, she had no hope, no reason to live, and no purpose. But now because of Jesus she has joy, hope and purpose, and for the first time in her life, she now a reason to live.
What a privilege to be a part of God’s miracle work in Cambodia, and an answer to someone’s prayer.

The Pimps are finding Jesus

2010-06-30T06:20:00.001-07:00

Something is different at kid's club this year...the pimps are coming. Yes you're reading this right. Right alongside the little children are their pimps. And not only are they coming to kid's club but they're coming to church too. And as they are hearing about Jesus they're changing. In the last few weeks, 3 pimps have stopped trafficking. The Pastor at Rahab's house found one of these young men a construction job that pays him $50 a month, a great reduction in pay for what he made transporting young girls.

Another set of twin boy pimps (young teens) used to be very bad boys, but recently they've begun to change...they're no longer selling drugs to the children, or running the girls.

Its amazing, first to see these teen boys singing, listening, coloring and enjoying kid's club alongside the little girls. But then to hear what God is beginning to change in them, how they're beginning to recognize that what they're doing is wrong and wanting to do what's right. That's what the love of Jesus does...loves the evil right out of us!

Every day is like that here...amazing stories of what God is doing. So grateful to be here and witness the miracles!

Barb

Miracles happening in Cambodia

2010-06-30T06:04:00.000-07:00

It's day 5 here in Cambodia for our team, and the end of the third day working out at Svay Pak. But it seems as if we've been here so much longer. Our team is amazing, and working so well together. And God has been faithful to bless us and use us already in small and great ways.

As a bigger team, we've been able to split up our efforts and accomplish so much more. The previous post has details on the various tasks of our team. And as the leader, I have so much more responsibility and details to take care of, and that takes up a lot of my free time, which is why I haven't blogged yet this time.

But the most amazing thing is seeing what God has been doing in just one year since I've been here. Rahab's house in Svay Pak has not only grown,but moved. Just a few doors down from last year's location, this new building is 5 stories high. It will house an apartment for the director's on the top, school rooms, a large church, computer lab, and a large area for a medical clinic downstairs, which is also the Pastor's family quarters.

Last year we had 50 kids coming to kid's club, this year they're getting 200-300 kids every day. In addition to kids club, they come for school, computer training, church and medicine. Rahab's house is now the central hub of Svay Pak bringing Jesus, love, hope, joy and peace to a place that was once only full of evil, pain and violence.

There is still sex-trafficking, violence, drug and alcohol abuse, neglect and poverty...but Jesus is changing Svay Pak from the inside out, starting with the children, then the adults, and last but not least, the pimps.

Been up for over 36 hours!

2010-06-26T06:11:00.000-07:00

Well we made it, and its been a long, tiring, exciting day. Its so amazing for me to be back in Cambodia. I really love it here! We arrived to rain...which was awesome! The rain cools things down immensely. After unpacking, we had an orientation session with Don Brewster as he talked to us about what we'll be doing.

He's very excited to have us here to build relationships, show the love of Jesus, and offer people basic kindnesses and needs. He shared a story of a young girl who was being raped every day by her pimp brother. In addition, she was being sold at night for sex. The girl came into Rahab's house for a couple of aspirin for a headache. Because the people there showed her love and kindness she came back the next day. Then she came to church. Then she came to know Jesus. And then, in time she shared with the Pastor here what was happening to her, and now she's living at AIM's restoration center. And as Don said, "It started with 2 aspirin." That's how amazing God is!

And that is just one story of countless others describing the miracles God is performing here every day. One is that last year we had approximately 40-50 kids every day. Now 160-200 come! Last year, the church had approximately 160 in attendance, today that number is over 500.

But there is darkness and evil too. Don estimates that there are more pre-pubescent girls being held in brothels than before, and although several attempts have been made, none of these girls have been rescued. Corrupt police succeed in hiding the girls before IJM can get in the house to recover them. In addition, the girls who do want to go free, often go back to their pimps because he's all they have in this world. Also disapointing is that although last year we had free reign to travel into the alleyways and homes in Svay Pak, this year, the sex maffia stop Rahab's staff from going into these places.

Even more disturbing is the picture of two young boys, both of whom had come to kid's club last year...one may have been 10 the other 8. These boys at this young age raped a 9 year old girl in Svay Pak just 2 weeks ago. From one generation to the next, impacting with unspeakable evil younger and younger children.

But the most amazing news is that God is working! And His work continues to multiply and grow and expand and make a difference in the lives of so many...in the life of a whole community and soon to change a country.

Its just so wonderful to be invited to partner with God in this great work of rescue and redemption. "For if the Son sets us free, we are free indeed..." God is setting children free, parents free, a whole community free...and it all started with one Roseville, Ca couple being willing to say, "here we are Lord, Use us." I dare you to pray that prayer...your life will never be the same!

til tomorrow...got more stories to tell:)! Goodnight...I'm falling asleep at the keyboard!

Barb

Heading Back to Cambodia

2010-06-23T22:04:00.000-07:00

It's been exactly a year since I was in Cambodia, yet Cambodia has never once been out of my mind. Many mornings as I get up to begin my day, my heart, thoughts and prayers turn to the young girls in Svay Pak. While I'm beginning my day, they're ending theirs and should be heading to bed...instead they're beginning their work...their sex work.

Most of the young girls (5 and up) who live in Svay Pak are sold by their parents at night for sex. They have no choice, they know no other life. And yet, Agape International Mission,(aim4asia.org) is a ministry committed to helping rescue and restore these helpless, victimized children, and they are making a difference. In addition to the home that houses 60 girls who've been rescued and are being loved and restored to wholeness, AIM is also right in the middle of Svay Pak, reaching out to the young girls who've yet to be rescued.

This year our team of fourteen, (5 guys and 9 gals) will be assisting AIM in a variety of the ministries they've begun in Svay Pak. In the mornings I'll be teaching newer staff about the impact of trauma and how to help love and support the young children currently in the middle of their trauma. In the afternoons, I'll be assisting our computer team in teaching local people the basics of computers.

Another part of our team will be working with the children of Svay Pak (many of whom are trafficked at night), in the mornings and afternoons putting on a kid's club. This is what we did last year...and so we get to be with those children again. Except, last year we had 50-60 kids, this year there's 200!

One of our guys will be working in the Lord's Gym that AIM runs to reach out to the pimps and men of Svay Pak. To work in the gym they have to attend the bible study, and so many are hearing about Jesus and turning their lives to Him.

Our medical couple will be running a medical clinic in the mornings and afternoons in Svay Pak. And then on their lunch break, they'll be going to 5 local brick factories that house and work adults and children. They'll be putting on health clinics for them, teaching them personal and dental hygiene and first aid.

We are so excited about all that God has for us in Cambodia. I'll blogging again and so I encourage you to send the link to all your friends so that we can make as many people aware of what's going on in Cambodia. God is doing amazing work here and around the world to fight against the injustice and evil of human trafficking and sex trafficking. It's such an awesome privilege and honor to be here and see what God is doing, and in a small way be a part of the miracles He's doing here!

Thank you for your prayers. Please pray that God will strengthen and prepare us spiritually, emotionally and physically for the work He's provided for us to do.

Blessings, Barb

Thank you for sharing!

2010-05-03T17:26:00.000-07:00

I want to thank those of you who've left comments on my blog. I'm so excited to hear what God is doing in people's lives in healing them from their pasts! I praise God for His love and grace and freedom that He pours out on us! I would love it if you'd feel led to go to amazon and copy your comment here as a book review for Invisible Bond. What God has done in your life will encourage others to trust Him with their past as well.
May God continue to bless you as you pass on what He's done for you to others!
Blessings,
Barb

Day Four at the United Nations--the Best Day There!

2010-03-15T10:21:00.001-07:00

Thursday March 11th was my last day in New York at the United Nations. I really didn't have any plans for today. My team had a meeting that morning along with other NGO's (non-governmental organizations) to meet the United States Mission--the advisory board to the US Delegates. The Delegates are the ones who write the policy for our country, and other countries around the world in regards to women's issues, like abortion, women's rights, etc. Our team was only allowed to bring 15 women to the meeting and the names had to be submitted 24 hours in advance. I was not on that list.

The meeting was to be at 11:30am, and knowing I was excluded from the meeting, I headed on to the UN to go to a Delegates meeting in the conference room on violence against women. Here's where some interesting events took place! I ran into the woman who heads up the NGO our team came with. Her name is Babette Francis, a wonderful woman from Australia. I mentioned to her that the rest of the team was in the special NGO meeting and she told me that she was in that meeting too, but in fact they had the time wrong. Instead of 11:30am, the meeting was at 1:30pm.

Babette told me that she wouldn't be able to go to the meeting now as she was heading to the airport, and she gave me her spot in the meeting! So I headed up the street across from the UN to go to the meeting. When I arrived upstairs at security, my name wasn't on the list. I shouldn't have been allowed in. But when I explained that our team had gotten the time wrong, and now there was a spot open, she remembered Babette, and put my name down on the list.

So here I was, sitting in a meeting that I wasn't supposed to be at. Isn't God amazing!! I shouldn't have been surprised, because He opened many doors this week that I wouldn't have imagined. But this one was very impressive.

As several other women gathered, it was evident that our group outnumbered others by volume, and we were the only pro-life group present it appeared. Then in walked the Ambassador to the US Delegates, along with some of the Delegates. They opened the floor for NGO women to share the concerns on their hearts.

Two of our women shared important information on maternal mortality rates, and how it relates to legalized abortion. For interest, the highest rate of maternal mortality in the United States is homicide--women being killed because they refuse to get an abortion. Yet in countries where abortion is not legal, the maternal mortality rate is much lower. Even though I didn't get a chance to speak, I had prepared a very bright green sheet with information on sexual bonding and the impact on relationships, women and marriage. I was able to hand this to the assistant to the Ambassador with the promise that it would get into the hands of the Delegates making the policy.

But then something amazing happened. I didn't know it, but our team had arranged a private meeting with the Ambassador after the organized meeting. She had the fifteen of us put our chairs in a circle and go around and give our names, etc. This was the meeting God had me come to speak in. Again I handed her one of my green sheets, and speaking from the perspective of sexual health education, I discussed the need to inform our young women how sex bonds and attaches us in relationships, leading to destructive choices, unwanted pregnancy, abortion, and multiple relationship failures, including divorce. And she listened!! It was so amazing...and so powerful.

I left there on a high, knowing that God had orchestrated this divine appointment for such a time as this, with someone who had influence, and who also seemed to care for women. I'm praying that my little green sheet will find its way to people who can make a difference for our youth, and for women in general.

And then I had to run to find a cab to get me back to the hotel to catch my shuttle to the airport...with such seconds to spare I made it.

It was an amazing week...I felt your prayers. Thank you so much!

Barb

2010-03-12T11:15:00.001-08:00

Day Four at the United Nations

Day Three At The United Nations

2010-03-10T19:55:00.000-08:00

Today I met a woman, her name is Helene Oord at the coffee shop. When I asked her where she was from, she said The Kingdom of God. So we started talking. She was a little hard to understand but I found out that she worked for Trinity Broadcast Network, a national Christian broadcasting company. She was also involved in several groups around New York area, and was having dinner with the Governor of New York that evening. Then she invited me to a prayer meeting with UN staff members and Diplomats that they had every Wednesday at noon. After giving her my books and telling her what God has been doing, she wanted me to come and share with her prayer group.
Just before noon, I had two amazing experiences. First I talked with the Minister of Health from Zambia, a Christian woman. I shared with her my message and books, and she was so grateful. We exchanged business cards, and she asked if I would be willing to come to Zambia to speak to the people there.
Then, we had an invitation to meet with the Delegates from Iraq. They were two Christian men who spoke with us about the issue of abortion in Iraq. But it was amazing to hear them talk about God, and also how much they appreciate the American people for coming to rescue their country from the tyranny of the oppressive government. One of them was a translator for the American military and he shared how he wore the American uniform, and loved the American men and women soldiers. They allowed us to video tape some of our discussion, but when he talked about this, he asked that we turn off the videotape.
I left that meeting early to run over to the prayer meeting. I didn’t have much time with them, but although the group started out small it grew to about 30 people. I had the opportunity to share what God was doing, and give the vice-president of the group my books. But the amazing thing was that as we were praying, about 15 Christian college students came in from the University of Georgia. They were in New York on a mission. So they got to hear what I shared as well.
But the highlight of my day was going to the taping of Sarah Palin’s brand new show called Real American Stories. And this was the debut show...we were the very first audience. While we waited to enter the studio, I brought two of my books...one I signed to Bristol, Sarah’s daughter, and the other one to Sarah. Her assistant said she would take them right in to her as she getting ready to film. But she also told us that Sarah would not have time to speak with us after as she was heading right to the airport. But afterwards, she hung around and after she had talked to many people and the studio crew were shooing us out, I ran up by her, and she saw me, put out her hand to shake mine. I then said, ‘I’m the one who gave you the two books, one I signed for Bristol.” She seemed to know what I was talking about and said, “Thank you for what you’re doing.” Then we exchanged some, “God bless yous.” It was amazing. I really felt like we had made a connection.
So it was an amazing day of God opening doors beyond my wildest imagination. I had the opportunity to talk to many people, hand out my books, and share my story. I found that everyone connected with the reality of sexual bonding and healing.
Now tomorrow, our team has an invitation to speak with the US Delegation. But only 15 people are allowed in, and since I’m new here, and no one really knows me, I was not chosen to be one of the fifteen. I told Molly, the Director of Women for Life that I’d love to go if it was possible. So I’m praying if its one of God’s divine appointments that I’m able to attend. If not, then He has someone else for me to connect with.
Thanks again for all of those praying for me. I really feel your prayers. And God is moving and doing a great work here. More tomorrow!
Barb

Day One and Two at the United Nations

2010-03-09T20:03:00.000-08:00

Our first day at the United Nations Status of Women Conference started very early. We arrived at the entrance to the United Nations just before the 8am opening. Once in line we began the registration process to receive picture passes to the building. The servers were down and so it was two hours later before we had the photo passes and were able to enter the conference hall where the delegates roamed.
My first day was a learning curve, watching, listening, and following the lead of my team members who’ve been here before. We talked to many women passing out flyers regarding our workshops on the impact of abortion on women, emotionally, and psychologically as well as the growing evidence of the link between abortion and breast cancer.

I had the opportunity to meet a Member of Parliament for Namibia in South Africa. I was able to discuss my work with women and healing from their sexual past and give them my books. I also attended a meeting in the main conference room that has all the seats for the countries and the listening devices for translations.
One disappointment here is that the workshop Pam Stenzel and I were supposed to do was bumped by another group on our team and so we will not be speaking. But I am trusting that God has other reasons for me being here. A praise is that I have been given the opportunity to attend a studio taping of the Huckabee show with Sarah Palin hosting. I’d love to be able to give her one of my books, and am praying that God will give me an opportunity to do that.

Day Two
Today was an amazing day of opportunities. I attended a workshop put on by a group from Nigeria on the violence against women there. Afterwards I talked with several women from different countries in Africa and they were devouring all my materials, books, CDs, and brochures. The women of Africa are particularly anxious to have resources to help their women and are very open to our message.
I also spoke in length to a woman who works with the Family Research Council, a pro-life, pro-family political lobby group in Washington. They have amazing influence on legislature in support of marriage, life and family. She was eager to take my books as well and spread the word through her contacts and blogs.
But the highlight of my day was being able to share some of my testimony today in one of our workshops. We had some people who were somewhat hostile to our message but when we started sharing our testimonies you could see a softening from them. I praise God for giving me the words to share.
In only two days God has given me many divine appointments and opportunities to share with others. One of the greatest blessings is my team members. I’m here with doctors, lawyers, other speakers, leaders of international ministries, etc., and I can see God giving me contacts and open doors to spread His message of healing and truth.
Thank you so much for praying. Getting time to blog has been much harder than I imagined. We literally are gone from early morning until evening, and then meet as a team every evening from 9pm until 11 or midnight.
I’ll write again tomorrow and tell you all about the show! We’re also meeting the delegates from Israel tomorrow, and we have appointments to meet with the delegates from the US on Thursday.
Blessings, Barb

Speaking at the United Nations!

2010-03-04T16:20:00.000-08:00

Sometime in November I got a call from my friend, Pam Stenzel. She'd been invited to speak at the United Nations Status of Women Conference in New York City in March 2010. She was asked to speak on the impact of the free sex, free love culture on women. Now, Pam is big...I mean she speaks to over half a million people a year all over the world. But for some reason she has blessed me with her endorsements of the message God has given me to share about the healing we can have from our sexual pasts.

She's calling to invite me to speak with her at the conference. You can imagine how excited, scared and honored I was! Well here it is...the time has come. I leave March 6th to spend the week in New York City where I'll be speaking with a team of women called Women for Life International from all over the world. We'll have the opportunity to speak to delegates from countries all over the world, as well as the possibility of meeting with some of the most influential policy makers with regards to women's issues in the world.

I have no idea what to expect...so I'm just going with an open mind, available to meet and speak to whomever God brings my way. It will be long days talking and meeting with people. I'm asking people to pray for us while we're there that God will make us bold, will give us divine appointments and put the words in our mouths.

I'll be blogging throughout the week so you can experience this with me. As well, if you'd like to receive on the spot, up to the minute prayer requests, email me at info@barbarawilson.org and request to become part of my prayer team. I'll be texting my prayer requests to someone who will be sending them out to you. Also, look for my posts on facebook and twitter.

Thank you...can't wait to tell you all about it!

Kiss Me Again Book Release

2009-09-14T09:37:00.000-07:00

Saying 'So Long' but not 'Goodbye'.

2009-07-16T23:03:00.000-07:00

I've been home almost a week, but I can't forget the last morning we spent with the kids. I was excited because we were going to tell them an amazing story of King Solomon and his bride. The purpose of the story was to show them what true love looks like. When we love someone, we do everything we can to protect them, provide for them, and sacrifice for them. God chose King Solomon to write Song of Songs to describe what true marital love should look like, and to describe God's love for us. I asked Dustin and Robi to tell the story because I wanted married men who love their wives to tell the children of God's plan for marital love. You see, in this culture, men don't protect their wives or young girls, they exploit them, beat them, and abuse them...and in this village, sell them for sex.

Dustin and Robi had a chance to tell the girls how special they were and that God intended they should be loved, protected and honored. They also had a chance to teach the boys to honor their sisters, mothers, girlfriends and future wives. To protect them from harm, to guard their virginity, and honor them by not hurting them, using them or selling them.

After the story, we all had a chance to give the children a special message of love and blessing...and a chance to say 'so long', not goodbye. Tiffany captured tears streaming down the face of one young girl as we said our goodbyes...genuine tears that spoke volumes...she would miss us. We'd made a difference in her life. Her single tear winding through the smudges and sweat on her face made everything worth it. The heat, dirt, garbage, sickness, exhaustion, lack of sleep...yes it was all worth it to capture the depth of meaning behind that single tear.

I had a few tears of my own that day. It started right away, the moment we arrived at Rahab's House. Robi shared at breakfast an idea to get alone with one or more of the children who'd become special to us and through a translator speak a special blessing into their lives. My moment came almost immediately when I saw my little Peoa girl. Through the translator I told her how much I loved her; how special she was; how I'd never forget her and would always be praying for her. I hadn't gotten two words out when the tears began, and my voice cracked. I tried hard to stay composed because I knew from earlier in the week when one of our girls got emotional, that the children thought we were angry when we cried. We had to assure them that our tears meant we were sad...sad to be leaving them. Sad because we loved them so much.

When I was done and my translator had conveyed my emotional sentiments, little Peoa grabbed me with both hands around my neck and gave me the biggest kiss. The memory still causes tears to well up unwanted, without permission. I'll never forget that little girl, and I shall pray for her always, along with the other little girls in that village. I'm asking you to pray too...pray that God will rescue them, that He'll bring more Christians to love them and teach them and that the hearts of the parents will change as they give their lives to God. And as they change, the village will change, and the lives of the children will change too.

There is hope. Pastor Shantey and his wife have been in the village for only 8 weeks and already his church has grown to 160 people. That's rapid growth for anyone's standards. So although we said so long...its not goodbye. Because the God who invited us to come to Cambodia, remains. And the love and hope that we shared will continue through those He's put in place and through others He calls to come.

I said so long because I plan to go back to Cambodia one day...if God allows me that privilege. I shall hold those children again one day and kiss their smiling faces and tell them I love them once more. That's my prayer. But for now...its not goodbye, only so long.

Barb

I'm out of the Country but the Country's not out of Me!

2009-07-14T17:49:00.000-07:00

We left Cambodia on Friday afternoon at 6pm. On the one hand we were glad to leave the oppressive, humid heat, but on the other, so sad to leave the people. When asked what I found most challenging about the culture, I mentioned the heat, the chaotic traffic and last but not least the piles, and I mean piles of garbage everywhere--even in the middle of the street. More than once our driver had to navigate around large mountains of garbage.

But all of that paled in comparison to what I loved about the culture. Number one, the people. They are sweet, kind, friendly and appreciative. We noticed the difference when we arrived in Hong Kong and the people not only ignored us but responded rudely to our requests for help. In contrast the Kuhmer people enjoyed their tourists and loved to practice their english. And they were frequently apologetic even when we made mistakes.

Second, although I found the traffic and non-existent traffic rules a challenge, I also found it charming. Motos are everywhere--short for motorcycles. This is the most prevalent mode of transportation. In fact, entire families travel on one moto--up to five or six. I even found mothers nursing infants while weaving wildly in and out of traffic. But to be totally shallow (which I can be once in a while:) ) one thing that is awesome in Cambodia are the cheap foot and back massages. $7 for an hour foot massage with reflexology, and $10-13 for a full body massage. I'm going to miss those.

I'll also miss driving in the tuk-tuks. These are open carriages driven by motos. They're everywhere, and are very cheap. About $2 for a ride around the city. They hold about 6-7 Cambodians, and 4-5 American's!
As I adjust back to the American time zone and culture, I'm continuing to process all that I experienced. I asked God to change me on this trip and He did. Not only have my eyes been opened to what a BIG God we have and to see His amazing work in other parts of the world, but He also opened my eyes to see and feel the pain and evil that others face every day, things I can only imagine. I'm not sure what God wants me to do with this now. But one thing is for sure...now that I've seen, heard and witnessed the miracle work of God even in the darkest places on earth, I can never go back to the way I was. How I live, pray, love and serve will all change. Someone said to me the other night that it was so good of me to sacrifice and go to Cambodia. Funny, there's never been a moment I felt that I was honoring or blessing anyone. On the contrary, I said, I'm the one who was honored and privileged to be able to go. I feel like God has let me in on a secret...one He never wants me to forget, and one that He insists I share with all who will listen. You may just be the next one God wants to share this secret with.

I have more to share next time...when I said goodbye to my Poea.

Until then...
Blessings, Barb

The Last Day

2009-07-09T15:47:00.000-07:00

Its early Friday morning, July 10th, our last day in Cambodia. The last few days have been a whirl of activity. As the week has progressed I've become more anxious and saddened by the fact that we're going home today. I can't imagine leaving these precious children. I've come to love Cambodia and the people.

When I came I prayed that God would open my eyes to see Him at work here. And He has. There's no doubt that God has placed people here in strategic places to reach the people of Cambodia. He's brought people here from other countries, and raised up Cambodian young men and women to fight against the evil of sex trafficking. Although we're sad to leave, we're know that God's work will continue here.

The highlight of my trip was this past Wednesday. We were teaching the kids about our bodies. How God made our bodies and how they're a gift to us from Him. And when we take care of our bodies, we honor God. I also said that another way to honor our bodies is by doing kind things with them to other people, and not hurting other people with our bodies.

At the end I told them that I had something very important to say. That next to telling them about Jesus, this was the most important thing we would tell them. Then I went on to tell them that we knew that men came into this village and did things to hurt the bodies of the little girls, and the little boys. And that was wrong. We were not okay with that, and God was not okay with that. But I also told them that it wasn't their fault, they were not bad, they were not wrong. But what others did to them were wrong. I also said that when the boys take the girls to the men, that was wrong too.

Then I told them that if that had happened to them they could come and tell us and we would listen to them, love them and pray for them. We would not laugh at them, or be angry with them. We would love them. We would never hurt them. God would never hurt them. We were safe, we would help.

As I talked, and as Ponha translated, the children became very quiet. The smiles were gone, and serious looks came over their faces. I knew that they knew what I was talking about. For some it was the first time they heard that what was happening to them was wrong. I can still remember the looks on some of their faces. One little boy right in front, Poea, he looked at me with sadness, but also a longing hoping that what I said was true. Some of the girls looked away from me in shame. Some had tears in their eyes.

Although none came to talk to us that day, I know that what we shared got through. I could see it on their faces, in their eyes. It was the most fulfilling experience to let these children know that God loved them and would never hurt them, and that we were safe people for them. Although we're leaving, Pastor Shantey and his wife, and Rattanak and Alli who remain to work with the children and pastor the community, love those children and will continue to be a safe haven for them. And they will continue to teach them what is right and wrong and give them hope.

God is working and changing the hearts of the people, one by one. And as He does, more and more children will be saved from being sold. More parents will realize that selling their children is wrong and want to protect them.

Today we're putting on a carnival for the children and serving them lunch. They're very excited. But we're sad, because it will be the last thing we'll do with them. My prayer is that if God brings me back next year, I'll see these children again, and that none will be sold to brothels. And that the one brothel with the 60 girls locked down will be closed down. Even more that more people and more children will have given their lives to Jesus, and be changed.

That's my prayer...
Barb

Week Two In Cambodia

2009-07-06T06:27:00.000-07:00

Its Monday evening of our second week in Cambodia. The weekend was action packed. On Saturday we had the privilege of putting a fourth of July party on for the girls at Agape House. Its a secure, safe home where girls who are rescued from the sex slave trade live. Very few people are allowed on to the campus, and no one knows the location or purpose of the home. The safety of the girls is the highest priority.

When we walked onto the campus we could feel the love, hope and joy. It overflowed from the girls, the staff, and the founders, Don and Bridgitte. One of the girls on our team is a party planner and put on the most amazing party for these girls. We had decorations, a craft, and games. We brought traditional american music and sang some fun songs for them. We ordered some hamburgers and french fries for them, and had a cake made. The cake was so large they couldn't get it through the door! This is the first cake some of these have ever had. We found out that this was the best party these girls had ever experienced. They all had cameras and wanted to take our pictures. We felt like celebrities.

On Sunday, we attended church in a little village where Moses was preaching. Moses is an amazing man. Born in Cambodia, he came to the states before the Khmer Rouge massacred their people in 1975, and got his bachelors, masters and a doctorate degree. He returned to Cambodia a few years ago and founded AIM 4 Asia, a church planting organization. He has about 15 disciples who live with him and he trains daily to be pastors. In the past 4 years he's planted over 800 churches all over Cambodia. His disciples become the pastors. We got to speak at his church, sharing verses, and songs and a short message.

Sunday afternoon, we visited the killing fields where the Khmer Rouge slaughtered 2-3 million of their own people. A smaller number than the Jews in the Holocaust, but considering that there were only 7 million Cambodians at the time, it amounted to 40% of the population. Only 30 years ago, the torture, and killing that went on is beyond what I've ever seen or could imagine. We then visited the prison where thousands were tortured for no reason. They even put barbed wire on the upper floors of the prison to keep prisoners from committing suicide by jumping to their deaths. We saw pictures of terrible atrocities that no human should ever experience. After seeing that it makes it easier to understand how they could now treat their own children. Because although tourists come from all over to have sex with the girls, it is the Cambodian men who account for the greatest percentage.

Sunday evening we went to dinner with Moses, his wife, and his 15 disciples, men and women. They are godly men and women reaching Cambodia for Christ. Today, Moses and his disciples drove 3 hours and baptized 200 people and handed out rice to 400 families. Like his namesake from the bible, God is using Moses to lead the people of Cambodia to the promised land of eternal life.

Today we returned to Svay Pak. The children were waiting for us and so excited to see us. We're getting so attached to them as we become familiar with their names and faces. One little girl today ran up and jumped into my arms. She was new, I hadn't seen her before. One of my favorite little girls, her name is Peoa, has worn the same dirty top every day since we've been here. I don't think her clothes or her body has been cleaned in a long while. Her little arms and legs are so tiny. I don't think she gets fed much either. Although her little teeth are rotting, she's got the sweetest smile, and engaging laugh.

The two men on our team are constantly being asked on the street if they want 'girl's'. They've had some interesting conversations with those asking about how wrong it is to have sex with little girls. They've seen a few of these men convicted because of their converstions. We found out that men are hired to sit in the lobby of the hotels and drive customers to find girls, especially in Svay Pak...our little girls. We wondered why so many guys sat around doing nothing in the lobby...now we know.

The days are long, hot and tiring. But its a good tired. By 9pm we're ready for bed. But we fall asleep knowing that God is at work here in Cambodia, and we've had the privilege to join Him even for a short time in what He's doing here. I'm already dreading having to leave these children on Friday.

Until tomorrow....

Barb

60 girls held captive within our sight

2009-07-03T19:10:00.000-07:00

Its Saturday today. We're going to Agape today to put on a fourth of July party for the girls there. We're excited to meet them. There are 55 girls living there who've been rescued from the sex slave trade. Agape provides a safe home and the love and healing touch of God to help restore these girls. Many of them go on to help rescue and restore others like them.

Yesterday was an exciting day at Rahab's house. The children are so excited to see us when we come. They run to the van and jump into our arms and smother us with kisses. They are the most precious children, in need of so much love and affection, and to know that someone deeply cares for them.

We had the opportunity to walk through the village yesterday with the children and found out where many of them live. That's important, because when there are raids by International Justice Mission, the police are so corrupt they often help hide the girls and if we don't know where they live we can't go and get them.

Right across the street from Rahab's house is a brothel filled with what they believe are 60 girls who are held hostage there night and day. These are girls who are trafficked from other parts of Cambodia, Vietnam and Malaysia. There have been raids there to rescue the girls, but again the police often work to get the girls out the back and keep them from being rescued. Don Brewster, the Director of Agape House, quoted us some statistics the other day: 91% of sex workers (young and old--all trafficked) have to pay the police money. 75% of the sex workers have had sex with police officers and over 50% have been gang raped by police officers. So unfortunately, there is no one here to protect or rescue these girls.

But yesterday a miracle happened. The girls from the brothel are never let out, yet two girls came out of the brothel and came to Rahab's house. We convinced them to come in and play with us and do a craft. They said they might come back next week. They're older, maybe 16. Please pray for them.

One little girl who came yesterday, the counselor said is sold every night for vaginal sex. Often she has to stand for crafts because she's so sore. I watched her walk. She walks with her legs apart. She's very little--she looks maybe 5 or 6. Another little girl came all dolled up with makeup. She was also very little, maybe 5. We're worried about her. We have come to know what that means.

Remember Hooa? She's coming but she's changed. She's lost some of her life, her smile, her spark. She's more subdued, somber. And she always complains of being sick, a stomache, headache, throwing up. The counselor believes this is psychosomatic. Physical symptoms brought about by the emotional trauma she is going through. Please pray for her.

One week down, one more to go. We're becoming more attached to the children. It makes us more in love with what we're doing and I know it will be hard to leave. But please also pray for me. I don't think my sinus infection is healing well and I have a terrible rash from the heat. I think I'm allergic to it. The rash covers my chest and neck all the way to my chin. Its sore and very itchy.

Thank you for reading my blog and praying, and passing it on to others.
Many blessings,
Barb

An Unbearable Day Of Heat in Cambodia

2009-07-02T02:43:00.000-07:00

What a day! The heat and humidity never let up, and intensifies by midday. Rahab's house has a tin roof which just conducts the heat more. Its like we're in a sauna for six hours. My skin looks great except for the itchy heat rash I have on my chest.

Today at Rahab's house a doctor came and set up a free clinic for the community. By 2pm the place was packed with kids and adults waiting for the doctor. It created more chaos and heat. Some of the girls from Agape who've been rescued came today and did a craft with the kids. Its a miracle to see what God is doing to restore these girls from their horrendous ordeals.

A counselor who's been working at Rahab's house for the past six months with the children has been telling us some of their stories. Today she pointed out a young girl and her sister who began coming about two months ago. The day they came, this counselor (her name is withheld to protect her) was telling a story of a racoon who had the most terrible thing happen to him. This was the first time the children heard that what was happening to them was wrong. These two girls began to cry. Later they told one of the translators that they were sold every night. The one girl lifted up her skirt to show the long claw marks from the night before that a man had done to her.

Some of the children are drugged with meth to keep them awake all night so they can work, which is why they're so sleepy during the day.

Today one of the little boys, Borin, went home after the morning session where his aunt beat him severely. He came back to Rahab's house and was too afraid to go home again. So he had lunch with us. The parents believe good discipline is beating their children. They are the most neglected, starving for love and affection human beings Í've ever met. They hang on to us constantly soaking up our love and affection, something they don't receive from their parents. The children take care of the babies, carrying them around all day. They don't wear diapers and so we're always hoping we're not the ones to get peed on that day!

The Cambodians sell their children to the brothels, but the Vietnamese sell their children out of their homes. The counselor told us that this past December a nurse came to do gynecological checks on the girls in a vietnamese community near where she lives. The nurse found 37 girls who'd been raped brutally evidenced by the vaginal scars they had. Their mothers pack their daughter's vaginal area with salt after sex to stop the bleeding so that when they go to school (if indeed they do go to school) the next day they won't bleed. They also then sew up their daughters vaginal area (without any anaethesia) and and sell them as virgins again, over and over.
I know its hard to imagine that parents could treat their children like this. Its hard for me to imagine as well, or process emotionally what these children live through on a daily basis. The only way for me to cope is to write about it, and try to steal my emotions from feeling it, or my mind from imaging it. And my only hope is that God knows, and He promises to avenge the wicked, rescue the oppressed, and comfort the afflicted. If you could see these children's faces every day you'd know there's a God. Because only God could give them the strength to survive what they do and still freely love and receive love. It can only be God who allows their faces to shine with a ready smile the moment you look at them. And only God can help them even for a brief moment enjoy just being kids as we play games with them, and do crafts.

And only God would care enough to call people to give up all they have and come to Cambodia and other parts of the world and be His hands and feet offering comfort, love, hope and rescue. Only God would care that much.

Barb

What Hell On Earth Looks Like

2009-07-01T02:21:00.000-07:00

Today is Wednesday, July 1st. After sleeping all of yesterday, today I woke up feeling much better. Thank you for praying. Once again our team drove the chaotic streets through Phnom Penh to Svay Pak. The children are getting to know us, and are waiting for us, waving to us as we drive through the village.

Svay Pak is the pit of hell. It is a town of alcholism and drug addiction, and sex trafficking. Many of the adults are up through the night drinking and doing drugs and having sex with children, and so we have to start the vacation bible school later each morning because the children sleep late. In Cambodia children are a commodity. They are sources of income for the parents. From the earliest age children are expected to work to support their parents. In Svay Pak and other parts of Cambodia the parents spend the money they make selling their children on alcohol and drugs, but also tvs, and other expensive items, yet neglecting to provide their children with some of the basic necessities.

I have so many stories to tell you today. Remember our little girl who came with makeup on? I found out her name, its Hooa. My team tells me that yesterday she came late again with makeup and was very sick. Of course we don't know for sure, but the people who are working to rescue these children say that 100% of the girls are trafficked here. If it hasn't happened yet, it will soon. Pray for this little one. She's beautiful, and bright, and full of life.

Kim from our team, pointed out a young boy who came to the center today. He doesn't usually come, but he came today and was skipping with the children. The Director told us that his father trafficks him out every night to men for sex...every night. Now that is hell on earth for this young one.

The Director of Agape House, Don, came to speak with us today. He showed us a picture one of the girls at the house drew for him of what had happened to her. Then he read her story to us. At nine years old she was being sold in a brothel and having sex with 5-10 men every night. They rescued her and now she is healing from her atrocious experiences. We will get to meet her on Sat when we go to Agape. Don says she is a miracle of the healing work of God.

The people who work here day after day are amazing. They are in the center of the worst evil and God is using them to bring hope and healing not only to the children, but to the families who are in bondage to this evil. In the last 5 weeks, they've been able to rescue 6 girls from Svay Pak. God is changing the people's hearts in this town through the work of the center and the church they've planted there.

But they need our help. With 54 girls at Agape, they're at capacity and so to rescue anymore means they have no where to put them. Don says that by September they'll be out of money for Agape, with costs of approximately $800 per girl per month. And now before they can rescue anymore girls, they need to open up a new home.

But God knows. He is the One who has begun this work, and He will carry it through. But He will use us to help. Be praying about how God might use you to help Him rescue the abused, neglected children of Cambodia.

One last thing...foreigners come from all over to have sex with the girls. But evidence shows that its the American men who treat the girls the worst, with torture and beatings, in addition to the sex.
A sad, but real truth.

Keep praying for us...the heat is unbearable, we sweat through everything within minutes of being outside. Its a long, strenuous day working with the children in the heat. But praise God, more children are coming every day.

More tomorrow...
Barb

The Cambodia Adventure Continues

2009-06-29T22:48:00.000-07:00

Cambodia adventure continues

2009-06-29T22:43:00.000-07:00

Its Tuesday. My team encouraged me to stay back and rest today so I could get well. I left California with a cold, and its gone into my chest and sinuses. I'm praying that this day of rest will allow me to get well. I'd appreciate your prayers too. There is so much to do, and it will take everyone on the team contributing these next two weeks. Please pray for strength and the ability to deal with the extensive heat and humidity as we work throughout the day.

We're up at 7 am and leave by 8. We're not home until 5pm. There is no airconditioning, and electricity for fans comes and goes throughout the day at Rahab's house. Rahab's house was bought by Agape International in the center of Svay Pak. It used to be a brothel, but they've turned it into a church and community center for the kids during the week. A young pastor and his wife and infant son live there now, up in what used to be the virgin room. Young virgins yield a lot of money, so little girls under ten are sold as virgins. When Agape took over they found permanent blood stains on the floor and bed in that room.

But now the whole building is flooded with joy, laughter, light and God's presence. You can feel it. The people who now come to this building every day are safe. Those who work here now care about the people, and love the children. Here the children can be children again, if only for a couple hours a day. Yet some of the people, especially the traffickers, even the parents who profit from selling their children, resent Agape for being there. The young man who runs Rahab house has been threatened. They say to him, we know why you're here...you can't stop what we're doing. The traffickers work like the mafia...the people don't go against them.

The little boys are taught young to be runners for the girls. Little boys starting under 10 years old are paid to get the girls and bring them to customers. There's no use going to the police, cause they're in on it. In fact the chief police of Svay Pak is the one who used to own the brothel that's now Rahab's House.

In the midst of the hell of Svay Pak, God's light is shining. Young children are coming to know Jesus, and are discovering for the first time that what is happening to them is wrong.

I don't know about our little girl yet, but will find out when the team gets back tonight. I'll let you know if she came in today. Svay Pak is like living in hell. Its a huge filthy, dark slum. Almost all the children in that area are trafficked.

Last night while I was blogging to you, an older woman, probably a grandmother came in with three little girls all dressed up. They were very little, all under ten years old. About fifteen minutes later she came out with a different girl and met a man. It turned my stomach. Even here in our hotel girls are sold. Our first morning for breakfast an old American man came in with a young local girl. I see him around here all the time...the emotions I feel towards him are ones I've never felt before.

Thanks for your prayers and reading my blog. Please pass the link to as many people as you can who will pray!

Blessings, barb

My Cambodia Adventure

2009-06-29T07:39:00.000-07:00

Its almost 10pm on Monday evening, and we've just finished our first day here in Cambodia. We had a great trip on our way here stopping in Hong Kong for a day. Cambodia is like no place I've ever seen, or could have imagined. I'm still trying to process what I've seen, smelled and experienced today. First of all, we're in the capitol, Phnom Penh. Its a big, crowded city. People mostly drive around on motorbikes transporting their entire families on one bike, including infants. Traffic lights, and order on the roadways are non-existent--and pedestrians do not have the right of way! I've already had two tuk-tuk rides--a motor drawn open carriage. Its a popular way to travel here.

This week we're doing a Vacation Bible School program with the children in Svay Pak. This is a highly trafficked area with most of the children trafficked in the sex slave trade. The children were incredibly excited to meet us this morning. They're sweet, precious and very friendly. Our guides took us around to the homes of the families in Svay Pak. There is so much poverty, with entire families living in open shacks the size of a small bedroom.

Its just so hard for me to process that these young, small, precious children are sold by their families every night and used for sex. One little girl showed up today with makeup on. She had to be about 6 years old. We found out that the week before she'd come to kids club with bruises all over her. Her mother had given her a beating because she refused to have sex with a man. She's still a virgin. After tonight she won't be...she's 6 years old. Her childhood has just ended. I don't know if I'll be able to sleep tonight. I've been praying for her every since I saw her.

On our way home tonight we got caught in a rain storm. Within minutes the streets flooded a couple feet deep. Our tuk-tuk driver had to drop us off to walk back to our hotel because he couldn't drive through the water. We waded in dirty, sewer water up to our knees. It was quite an adventure. Thanks so much for your prayers. We need them. We're still jet-lagged, the heat and humidity is extreme and some of us our sick. But we feel so privileged to be here, and excited about what God wants to show us of Himself here in this place. He is working. He is a beacon of light here in the midst of this evil. Continue to pray for God's power to rescue these children from this life of torment, and their parents from the ignorance that perpeuates this from one generation to the next. And pray for Agape International who are here every day being Jesus to these people, and providing a refuge for the children.

Blessings,
Barb

2009-06-26T21:48:00.001-07:00

Testing mobile blogging

Cambodia 2009

2009-06-26T16:37:00.000-07:00

Today I leave for Cambodia. My first mission trip. I'm both excited and nervous. Working with Agape International, www.aim4asia.com, my team and I will be having an impact in the lives of young children, girls especially, who are currently involved in the sex slave trade. As well, we'll have an opportunity to work with a house full of girls who've been rescued and are now being restored by Agape.

Its hard to imagine this evil going on day after day, with everyone knowing, and no one doing anything to stop it, but rather encouraging and profiting from it. Here in America we have no frame of reference for this. Yes, I know its happening here, but thankfully its neither accepted, encouraged or allowed. Not so in Cambodia. Everyone is involved; family, friends, police, tourists...there is no where to escape from it. It is your destiny if your family is poor.

I don't know what to expect, which is part of the excitement and nervousness...the heat, humidity, fatigue, poverty, in addition to this evil makes me nervous because I sense I'm journeying to the pit of hell. But I'm also excited, because I know that God is there--right in the midst of this hell. He is already working. He's merely invited me to witness and participate in what He's already doing. I'm excited to see Him at work in ways I could never imagine, and possibly never witness here in our land of freedom and plenty.

You can take this journey with me as I blog about the trip in the days to come and view the pictures and videos we'll be uploading to our site. In addition to this site, you may also want to visit our website, www.cambodia2009.

The adventure begins...stay tuned.

Teen Girls and Sex

2009-06-04T10:22:00.000-07:00

Last weekend I spoke at a teen girls conference on sex. More specifically, I talked with them about how sex creates a bond, physically, emotionally, spiritually and even chemically. And this bond outside marriage can wound us, and impact our ability to bond in future relationships, even marriage.
But unlike other teen audiences, with this one, I also talked about sexual abuse, and forced sex as in rape. In my experience leading women through sexual healing, I've discovered that for many women, their first exposure to sex begins with someone molesting them, forcing them to have sex, or exposing them to sexually explicit material or behavior.
In addition to opening their sexual pathway early, it can cause great damage, wounding and shame. Most young girls don't tell anyone of their experiences because of the shame, thereby allowing the abuse to continue. And then when these young girls reach puberty, the abuse can often cause them to become sexually promiscuous.
After I spoke, I offered the girl's an opportunity to speak confidentially with me. And so they came, several girls, telling me of their experiences with abuse in their past. And their current sexual choices. My heart broke to hear their painful stories. But I was also excited for them. Bringing their secrets into the open, and healing from past wounds can protect them from re-wounding themselves sexually in the future. It can also save them from living decades haunted by shame and pain.
Although we need to address teen sexual behavior, we need to be aware that if teens are having sex early--12 or 13 years of age, they may have been exposed to sex earlier in their life that contributed to this behavior.
But there's hope. God can heal anything. I've already watched Him do it with countless women who've been wounded by sex in their pasts. And I know He'll do it for these girls too.

Joining God in Cambodia

2009-05-26T12:22:00.000-07:00

I never imagined that when God began to take me on this journey of leading others through sexual healing from their pasts that He would open my eyes to a terrible evil that grieves Him greatly--the sex slave trade. Second only to drug smuggling in crime profit and tied with arms smuggling, human trafficking preys on 800,000 people a year globally--most of whom are children, young boys and girls used for the sex trade.

This June, along with 8 others from my home church, I'll be heading to Cambodia, a hub for the sex slave trade. Working with Agape Ministries, www.aim4asia.com, we'll be helping minister to the young children currently being trafficked, and those who've been rescued. As we head into some of the poorest villages, home to brothels, sex traffickers and sex tourists worldwide, we'll have a front row seat to the evil that we can only imagine, but is the day-in-day-out reality for those victim to it.

I don't know what to expect. I don't know how I'll process the evil I'm about to witness. I have no frame of reference. How will I love on the youngest, most vulnerable child in the day, knowing that as I say goodbye, they'll be brutally ravaged that night? Even more, how will I ever be able to leave them all behind when I return home.

I have no answers for these questions. For now, all I know is that God is in Cambodia. He sees the evil. He hears the cry of the abused, the 'least of these'. And He's invited me to join Him there. To witness not only the evil, but how He is working in the middle of it all. We're going to a poor, dirty place, more evil than we can image, and God is already there.

I'm not sure how God will use me, but I'm sure of this--I will not come home the same person as when I left. I will never see life the same again. I will never see God the same again. And I can't wait.

You can find out more about my ministry on my website at www.barbarawilson.org., follow our team's mission at www.cambodia2009.com, or find out how you can join God in Cambodia through supporting me by emailing me at bwilson@barbarawilson.org.

Welcome to My Blog

2009-02-11T18:50:00.000-08:00

I'm hoping to use this Blog as an opportunity to connect with many of you who've read my first book, The Invisible Bond; How To Break Free From Your Sexual Past and hear your stories of what God has done in your life through this book.

I've just finished my second book called Kiss Me Again, Restoring Lost Intimacy in Marriage due out with Waterbook Multnomah, in Sept. 09. Stay tuned for more about this book.

My next project is to get my bible study for sexual healing published and have it available for you sometime this year.

I have lots of ideas for this blog. For starters I'd like to post and answer questions I receive from people all over the world. Questions that you may be wondering about yourself.

I trust this blog will be a source of encouragement and hope for you.

Blessings,

Barbara